Urinal Etiquette:
Excitable: Runs in, grabs for zipper, zipper is stuck, finally gets it
down, finds shorts have twisted around his leg, can't find hole, rips
button off in rage, pisses in pants.
Sociable: Joins a friend in a piss, whether he needs one or not.
Boss-eyed: Looks at a urinal to his left, pisses in one on his right.
Nosey: Peers at the man in the next urinal to see how he's fixed.
Timid: Unable to piss when someone is watching. Flushes urinal as if he's
already used it, sneaks back later.
Indifferent: If all the urinals are in use, pisses in sink.
Show-off: No hands, fixes tie, looks around, pisses on floor.
Worried: Unsure of what he has been into lately, makes quick inspection
before pissing.
Drunk: Holds left thumb in right hand, pisses in pants.
Absent-minded: Opens vest, pulls out tie, pisses in pants.
Disgusted: Attempts to piss for a while, gives up, walks out, goes a few
paces, turns around and charges back. Doesn't make it.
Sneaky: Silently farts while pissing, knowing the man standing at the next
urinal will be blamed.
Immature: Pisses directly into bottom of urinal because he likes to see it
bubble.
Patient: Stands for a very long time while reading the Daily Telegraph with
free hand.
Desperate: Having waited for ages in a queue, grinds his teeth while
pissing in pants.
Efficient: Waits until he has to shit and then does both jobs at once.
Tough: Bangs penis on side of urinal to dry it.
Obese: Has to back up and take a long blind shot at urinal, misses, pisses
on shoes.
Frivolous: Plays his stream of piss up and down and across urinal, trying
to hit fly.
Current Rating (6 Votes): 4.3